Matthew Doman
I think all the time about my blog. I like to blog and I enjoy reading blogs. I have not felt very "bloggy" lately though. My brother passed away on November 11 and my life changed forever. I knew something was going to happen, I just had that feeling. I had been having a lot of dreams about my family and in particular about Matt. I remember asking my Heavenly Father for help to deal with whatever was going to come my way. The news came very early in the morning. It was my dad that broke the news to me. What a horrible thing to have your father tell you. He had the hardest job. I hung up the phone and told my wife. She stayed strong for me. My insides were churning and I felt weak. The rest of the day I remember very well, but I don't want to write about it all. I will as time goes on but not all at once. It's hard and somethings just need more time to simmer within me.
I miss my brother a lot. I am the oldest in the family and Matt was the second oldest. We were pals from the beginning of time and did a lot of crazy things. I loved hanging out with him and sharing my growing up years with him. He was a great brother. It's been a month now and the pain is still so raw. The holidays this year have been harder for me to get into the spirit. I'm there now though. Caryn and I had a great weekend with the kids and getting all the holiday spirit we could get. I have a 14 year old, a 12 year old and a 2 year old. Shopping for all of them is a lot of fun. Christmas morning will be looked forward too with a large amout of anticipation BUT in the deep pools of my soul created by all my tears I will think about my brother and I will send a cheerful good morning heavenward and muster out a Merry Christmas. It's all I can do.
5 comments:
I love you so much, I also just posted on my blog, I know just how you feel about needing so time...
Bring on the christmas spirit because Matt would want us to!!
Much love big bro.,
We're all thinking about you guys, and Matt.
It will be a different kind of Christmas, for sure.
Love you, Troy.
It is all any of us can do right now. Muster up whatever joy we can...we need to for others around us.
we'll always hurt inside, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot.
But we need to be grateful for Christmas.
Christ was born.
Christ died for us so we could all live again............and hang with Matt.
we will
so for that we celebrate
Troy,this will probably be a very sad time of remembrance for family as well as his many friends.I never had the chance to get to know him,but i do know that Matt would not have wanted this to be a time of sadness.Weve lost a very loving brother and friend,but i think we need to reflect on all the joyous times he gave us.
Hang in there Troy
It's hard when the world keeps moving on and sometimes we just need it to stop for a minute so we can breath the breath caught in our chest.
Have fun at your party tonight. You have a great family.
Good food and big hugs.
love you and thinking of you guys.
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